“Laws, like sausages, cease to inspire respect in proportion as we know how they are made.” — John Godfrey Saxe
Luckily, there is nothing sausage-like about the Shimmer Fiktionwerks, so a good behind-the-scenes peek can only delight the reader; and the more you know about how the industry works, the better off you are. Thus we are thrilled to present this pictorial tour of our processes.
The Shimmer Fiktionwerks fabrication process begins with the delivery of unprocessed slush ore. This ore is mined from ventures all over the world, wrested from the earth by the pure strength and daring of skilled miners. Several tons of it are delivered to the Fiktionwerks plant each day. Our team of highly-trained orphans picks through the slush ore, selecting only the finest pieces for further attention.
The Sorting Room
The ore is sent to the sorting room, where it is crushed into small pieces. Pure essence of fiction is extracted from these fragments and sent deeper into the bowels of the Fiktionwerks.
The rest is sent to the rejection plant, where it becomes an ingredient in patent remedies. Each tone of ore yields less than an ounce of fiction-essence.
In the editing process, the essence of fiction is spun into tales, sure to delight, terrify, and amuse. Any remaining impurities are stripped away, and the individual threads come together to create a pleasing whole. A complete issue requires eight to ten ounces of spun essence. The threads are so finely spun that they would reach all the way from your house to the moon–and halfway back!
Layout and Design
The next step is to lay out the tales. Skilled typesetters, master of the dark arts of presentation, prepare the issue for the printer. They convert the gossamer threads of spun tales into a pleasing arrangement of text and images, that may easily be read by all, using all 26 letters of the alphabet, plus a dozen compelling letters of their own design.
Now it’s time to print the tales! Each issue requires fifteen gallons of squid ink to print.
Finally, an issue of Shimmer is complete! It leaves the Fiktionwerks and begins its long journey to homes all over the world, hand-carried by urchins to destinations as far away as Australia.
Thank you for joining us on this tour of the Shimmer Fictionwerks plant. Please exit through the gift shop. If you have any questions, leave them in the comment box below.